Resident Evil: Afterlife (2010)
Starring: Milla Jovovich; Ali Larter; Kim Coates; Shawn Roberts; Sergio Peris-Mencheta; Spencer Locke; Boris Kodjoe; Wentworth Miller; Sienna Guillory; Kacey Barnfield; Norman Yeung; Fulvio Cecere; Ray Olubowale.
Directed by: Paul W.S. Anderson.
Colour/97 Minutes/R
Milla Jovovich's character Alice (and a shit load of her clones) attempt to wipe out the Japanese headquarters of the evil Umbrella Corporation and kill main baddie Albert Wesker. After apparently killing Wesker and losing her T-Virus powers, she then turns her attention to finding the apparently T-Virus free Arcadia. That turns out to be a myth and she looks for those she left behind from Resident Evil: Extinction, who were already on their way there. Her travels lead her to a group of survivors in Los Angeles, living in an abandoned prison. Outside the prison walls a horde of zombies are digging their way in from underground, and a giant, axe-wielding T-Virus monster, called the Executioner, is making short work of the front gate. Oh, and hey, you didn't think Umbrella and Wesker were down for the count yet did you? After some promising fun in Resident Evil: Extinction, the series goes back to the sewer of excesses that was Resident Evil: Apocalypse. Too much mindless action and throw-away characters are thrown into a badly-plotted and written storyline that ends with one of the worst final battles I can recall. The amount of badly-done CGI in the finale makes me wonder how this film ever made it to theatres. I think part of that was because I was watching effects intended for 3D, but fuck, it looked really bad. And where was the Jovovich nude shower scene? They set it up and never paid off. Bastards. I'm dreading the sequel they managed to set-up. Avoid. Abort.
Night of the Living Dorks (2004)
Starring: Tino Mewes; Manuel Cortez; Thomas Schmieder; Collien Fernandes; Hendrik Borgmann; Nadine Germann; Sissi Perlinger; Henry Gründler; Patricia Thielemann; Oliver Grober.
Directed by: Mathias Dinter.
Colour/89 Minutes/NR
A German horror comedy/parody that is best described as American Pie with zombies. High school nerds turn into zombies and suddenly become popular with their peers. Not horrible I suppose, but not good either. It's apparently being remade for North American movie-goers (although this was first announced four or five years ago, and still nothing has appeared). Do they feel that they can out-raunch the Germans? If so they might have something, because this film is pretty tame. A few amusing moments of comedy, lots of filthy language, some tits, and some okay gore keep things going from point A to point B. Probably the most amusing thing is watching with the English dubbing and the English subtitles on, and seeing how totally different they are from each other. Lost in translation indeed. One might be keen to rent this on a lazy day.
Dawn of the Dead (2004)
Starring: Sarah Polley; Ving Rhames; Jake Weber; Mekhi Phifer; Ty Burrell; Michael Kelly; Kevin Zegers; Michael Barry; Lindy Booth; Jayne Eastwood; Boyd Banks; Inna Korobkina; R.D. Reid; Kim Poirier; Matt Frewer.
Directed by: Zack Snyder.
Colour/110 Minutes/NR
One day the world wakes up to a viral outbreak that reanimates the recently dead, turning them into vicious flesh-eaters. Shit is hitting the fan, as society is breaking down at an alarming rate. A group of survivors flee to a nearby mall, only to find themselves at the mercy of the rent-a-cops who have already set themselves up there, and soon another group of people join them. They know they can't stay there forever, and now must attempt to work together to find a way out, as the masses of zombies increase outside the walls of their department store prison. Here's one of those remakes that probably sunk the heart of every fan of the original classic. I went into this film expecting to dislike it, but I found myself enjoying it. Even the addition of fast zombies didn't ruin it for me. It fits the more slick, flashy, fast pace of the film. I found the opening effective. Indeed most of our current mass media-polluted culture would ignore late night local TV news warnings, and even warnings on 24-7 news networks. How many outbreaks of new "super" flu have we been desensitized to in recent years? It's background noise during the opening credits. So it both sets the film's back story up and reflects our indifference to it, until it literally bites us in the face. Unlike in the original film, the virus brings the dead back almost instantly, thus there's very little time to react to the situation and it quickly snowballs. It doesn't help that the population is so much larger today than in the 1970s. There's just more people to infect. As it gets going, this film briskly breezes over a lot of the talking points Romero's original brought up, which I think is a wise decision overall, because who can match it? Beyond the opening dig at mass media, this movie is not really interested in pondering racism, commercialism, police brutality, or anything else interesting. Well, there's the zombie baby, but that goes nowhere. The much larger cast kills any real dramatic weight. That's not a major problem because the film focuses on action, gore, and nihilistic, impending doom for the characters, and in that regard it manages to be one of the best of the big budget zombie films of the last ten years or so. Good rental.
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